What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Why are liberals so bad at grasping alternative facts? For example, if something doesn’t happen the exact same way Trump described it, liberals dismiss it as false; while conservatives are able to fully understand the underlying principle.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Who is the beast of Revelation 13?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

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Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What is the one thing you don't understand that others do?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Make Nazis afraid again!

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Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Why do men want to suck dick?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

How can parents identify and address early signs of racial bias in young children?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Where can I get sure fixed matches on Instagram?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

How do people develop stage 4 cancer without noticing until it’s too late?

TEXT:

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

What are 50 random facts about yourself?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.